Haircut Roulette


Barber 02aThe guy who has been cutting my hair for the past 25 years up and moved away.  Thus began the adventure that everyone dreads and hates: finding someone else to cut my hair.

I should explain that I don’t have normal man’s hair.  My hair is fine and tends to curl like crazy at the slightest hint of humidity.  In high school, in spite of being an incredibly Caucasian guy, I had a full-blown afro the size of a beach-ball.  I think my hair is of Irish descent, but I don’t have any evidence to back that up other than when I see Irish people in the movies or on TV, they have similar hair.  Or I just secretly wish to be Irish.  I think that last one is more accurate.

Most hair stylists I’ve been to have no idea what to do with my hair.  They end up either scalping me while trying to cut off all the curly parts (Hey!  It’s all curly!  Leave me some hair!).  Or they try to give me a “normal guy’s” haircut and then trying to hold in place long enough for me to leave the salon by putting half a bottle of “product” on it.  (“Product” is salon-speak for “overpriced goop in a bottle”.)  I don’t use product.  Ever.  I never have that much time in the morning.  But that doesn’t stop them from cutting it and shellacking it and say, “Hey look!  You have hair just like Tom Cruise!”  And I say, “Ummm … nooo.  Not unless Tom Cruise is playing the part of an escaped mental patient.”

So, I have been searching for over a year for a place that can cut my hair the way I like it.  After a series of bad haircuts, I finally said, “Hey, if I don’t like the way anyone cuts my hair, why am I paying them $50 to do it?”.  So I’ve been going to one of those “quickie cut” places.  I’ve been there 3 times in the past 3 months.  I’ve had 3 different stylists cut my hair.  I’ve had 3 radically different haircuts in 3 months.

It is like playing Haircut Roulette, but without the hope of a big payout at the end.

But at least it has made getting a haircut an adventure!  I never know what I’m going to get.

This time I got a good haircut.  Next month?  Who knows.  I’ll just spin the “Wheel o’ Hair” and see what comes up.




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