It is Saturday evening as I write this, meaning that in a mere 36 hours or so, I will be back at work for the first time in several weeks.
I know some of you are saying, “Oh, boo hoo!”
Others are saying, “You were off for several weeks and only managed to post seven blog posts, one of which was a repeat of a post from last year?”
Still others are saying, “Now, who are you again?”
That’s fair.
No, I didn’t make my initial statement about having to be back at work on Monday as a cheap ploy to gain sympathy. I merely mentioned it as a springboard for my REAL topic of this post, which is the relative speed of time.
I am not breaking any new ground when I state that time off from work speeds by like runaway freight train on crack (sorry about the mixed simile) and time at work oozes by like a sloth on Quaaludes. (Again, I apologize for the mixed simile … I am really struggling here … like a fly in a spider’s web made of that stuff they use to stick your new credit cards to the paper they mail it to you in.)
So how is it that the past several weeks went by in the blink of an eye, and an equivalent number of days spent at work seems to last longer than a James Joyce novel read aloud by someone eating taffy? (Sorry … sorry! I just can’t seem to stop this.)
Well, I’ll just give you the answer since you already know it anyway.
It’s because I enjoy being off from work. And work is … well … work.
But here’s the really depressing thing. For the past four days, my memories have been popping up on Facebook from 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 … 10 years ago. And they all said essentially the same thing:
“I can’t believe the holidays are over and it is time to go back to work already. Where did the time go?”
Except for that one memory that popped up that said, “Man, I write similes like a chimp using a bowling ball to cook black-eyed peas.”
Biff Sock Pow 
It’s obvious Facebook has stolen your time and then smugly goads you with its loss and the fact you haven’t posted anything more interesting in the intervening years.
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I could not have said it better (or more depressingly) myself. After reading so many of my “I can’t believe the holidays went by so quickly” posts of the past 10+ years, I have decided to take a more active role in my own life. We will see what the results of that are.
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Let’s get this out of the way first, Biff. Boo Hoo and WHO are you again? Heh heh. Next Lone Star’s on me. My extended times off compose of bliss and then dread filling in on those last days and hours. Stupid brain loves to live in the future. As I age, I have tried, with middling results, to enjoy my present time. My days of living in past and future outnumber my days living in the present. So to speak, put your slide rule away, Biff. How can I undo years of practice? Anyway, I don’t envy the morass of your headspace right now. That is when I decide to draw!
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You hit the nail on the head there, Bro. I have lived the entirety of my life either in the past or in the future, but never in the present. I am continually looking anxiously at the future and trying my best to mitigate the terrifying effects it will have on me when I finally get there (IF I get there). But I am also always looking back at the past, and remembering how much more calm and serene I was back then (conveniently forgetting that in the past I was just as tied-in-knots about the future as I am now).
As you say so wisely, luckily we have our refuges to withdraw into … you to your drawing and writing, and me to my writing. Here’s to a more serene year for both of us!
(P.S. When I leave comments on your posts, they never seem to “take” and just disappear into oblivion. I’m not sure why that is. I also cannot seem to contact you through your “contact” page. Perhaps you have blocked me? 😀 )
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Well, time IS relative–I think Einstein said that, or maybe my dog. I really like my job but I would still rather be at home in bed:-)
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I’m pretty sure it was your dog, too.
And I feel exactly the same way you do. I am so very thankful for my job, but every minute I am there, I am wishing I were at home living a life of leisure.
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You always make me laugh, snicker or guffaw! I do look forward to that.
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Thanks, Pam! That makes me very happy! And I hope I get to bring you lots of laughs in the coming year. 🙂
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I have found a trick to avoid the horrible feeling of having to head back to work after several weeks of enjoying the hyggeness of your home: it is simple, you just not not work between Christmas and New Year’s Eve! LOL
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Hi Sis! That is a very good strategy. I will have to try that next year. ( I may be reversing that when I work through all of the multiple negatives in your comment. ha ha!)
Happy week after New Year!
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I have to admit, that for once in my life, I am eagerly awaiting the start of work on Tuesday! I can’t believe I am saying that since I spent the first five days of my break sick and sleeping but now I am sooooo ready to be done with this break!
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Wow … I’m not sure how long I would ever have to be off from work before I said I was ready for the break to be over! Years, I suspect.
I’m so sorry to hear that you were sick and sleeping. I hope you’re fully mended now. Here’s to a great week back at work for both of us! 🙂
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Totally mended now! Even had someone at church ask if I went away somewhere for my holiday on a proper vacation LOL apparently rested is a good look for me.
I will enjoy it to the fullest!
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That’s awesome! I think we can all use more rest. Hopefully, we’ll all get enough rest in the coming year. 🙂
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It’s true: a day spent “taking it easy” lasts only 14 hours with 6 off for sleep.Six hours spend at work feels like at least twelve. Slower than a slug munching its way through a huge head of cabbage.
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Now THAT’S a proper simile. And you are so right about work vs. leisure hours. I wish there was some way to reverse that.
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