We have finally made it to Friday and I think we should all pat ourselves on our backs and give ourselves high fives. I shall video the celebration and post it for us all to enjoy.
Here we go … on the count of three …
Okay, that did not go as well as expected. I think we can all agree that we should have done EITHER high-fives OR pats on the backs, but not both.
There is a lesson to be learned here for all of us, and I’m sure that, after our lengthy convalescences and after the various eye patches, finger splints, and wrist braces are removed, we will look back on this day and laugh.
And possibly sue.
But I would remind everyone that we here at Biff Sock Pow have an indemnity clause that is written at the bottom of every blog post. You can’t miss it. It is in bright white text on a bright white background in in 2 point Helvetica. (Italics added for emphasis. Quotation marks added for extra layers of abstraction. Dingbats added for obfuscation.)
Again, by the time your eye patches are removed, you will be able to see it quite clearly. The pain medications will make this much easier, so tip those plastic prescription bottles back and go to town. Just pretend you’re eating Skittles. Not only will you see the indemnity clause, I would not rule out seeing visions and possibly speaking in tongues.
But if there is a lesson here for all of us, it is that Friday celebrations can, and often do, get out of hand.
In an unrelated note, be sure to drop by my new affiliate, Dodgy, Murky, Dodgy, and Shifty, Attorneys at Law (registered in the Cayman Islands, not licensed to practice law in any of the non-contiguous seven continents). Be sure to mention my name and receive 7 & 2/3 percent off of the first court fine levied against you for bringing a frivolous lawsuit.
But the real story here (besides the fact that I now have an affiliate that I can mention every other paragraph), is that it is Friday and cause for celebration.
So get out there and enjoy your Friday!
But remember to dodge and weave if anyone tries to high-five you.
adj. Not inherent or essential