Being Thankful For The Slow Grind


I sure don’t know where the past two weeks went to, but wherever they went, I hope they found a good home and will enjoy living with their new owners.

I know why they went by so fast.  It’s because I was off from work.  Any days in which I don’t have to go to work fly by faster than the speed of light.  (And, yes, I know that, according to generally accepted theories, faster-than- light travel is impossible, but the people coming up with those cockamamie theories obviously have never studied how fast weekends go by when one doesn’t have to work.)

This has put me in a philosophic mood.  (So please put on your safety goggles and splash-proof aprons.)

Whenever I speak wistfully and dreamily about that day far into the future when I will get to retire, when I pine longingly for when my time will be my own, certain people in my life tell me that I will be miserable if I retire.  They use the logic that, since I have no real hobbies or interests, that I will be bored out of my mind after a week.

I have always pooh-poohed that theory based on the fact that I don’t need any hobbies or activities to enjoy myself.  I have no interest in woodworking or collecting anything or building anything.  I love any time when I can get away from the real world and live in the world I have always wanted to live in.  I am perfectly happy sitting here in my comfy chair, typing away, sipping coffee, and listening to music.  I love slipping away into my fantasy world where I am neighbors with Alistair and Alexis.

But after watching the past two weeks flit by in the blink of an eye, I am now feeling a bit uneasy about retirement.

If time will speed up exponentially when I no longer have to work and I can finally enjoy my time the way I want to, then the duration of my life between the day I retire and the final fall of the curtain will last approximately 20 seconds.

I have finally discovered that it is my job that is slowing down time enough for me to even be able to perceive the world around me.

So, based on that, I can never retire.

Our jobs are the gritty, non-skid sandpaper upon which our derrieres slide down on the super fun-slide to oblivion.

It makes the ride slow enough for us to perceive it.

It saves us from the curse of a joyful immortality that would only last about 20 seconds.



  1. I can’t wait to retire so I can get a new job doing something fun, and have more time to write! I hate being bored, and I also hate the thought of time just slipping away, although getting a bit of a lie-in in the morning would be so nice!

    Liked by 1 person

    • You’re so right! One of the things I’m most looking forward to about retirement is just not having to get up at the crack of dawn. My internal clock makes me more of a night owl. I would love to get up at around 9:30 AM and stay up until about 2:00 AM. It’s hard to do that with an 8-5 job, though.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I couldn’t agree more. I have been off for a week, and have another week to look forward to, but it will be gone in the blink of an eye. Then back to work, back to the horrible commute, January and February will feel like an eternity. The cold weather and lack of daylight doesn’t help. But if/when you do retire hopefully you will focus on your writing, which I enjoy reading very much. Happy new year!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Happy new year, Anne!

      Yeah, I’m not looking forward to January/February. Mostly I’m not looking forward to the next three days. I go back to work tomorrow and I know the next three days are going to be nothing but frustration as I try to remember passwords, try to remember what I was doing before the holiday, etc. But I just keep reminding myself that I really am very fortunate to have a good job.

      I’m glad you enjoy my writing. That means a lot to me. I spent so many decades writing things that only I would read and that was not rewarding at all. Knowing that something I wrote brings a little lightness into someone’s day makes me very happy.


  3. Quotes from our parents that each generation vows never to say when they retire…
    ‘You have more time, but it takes you longer to do everything.’
    ‘I’ve lost track of what day it is today.’
    ‘Where has the morning gone…’

    Liked by 1 person

    • Ha ha! You’re so right. I hear those all the time.

      Another one I hear all the time from retirees is, “I don’t know how I ever found time to have a job. I’m much busier now than I ever was when I worked.”

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Biff, your post resonated with me. You ARE a writer, and it clearly gives you joy. Not the television joy of jumping up and down and holding a beer but NOT drinking it. A quiet, close to the vest joy. The more you write, well, the better typer you will be, at least.

    However, you may even find yourself, wait for it, honing and improving your craft. The goal is not necessarily publishing. Speaking for myself, I would STILL do what I do if I was told there was NO chance of publishing. (of course, I’d speak to a lawyer first)

    I did not cartoon for many years – not sure why. I guess I (silly me) thought it was a childish pursuit, in spite of the cartoonists out there who sport body hair and carry mortgages. I have, since, owned the fact that I am a cartoonist, and always will be, first and foremost. I also like to write, and perhaps I will do that too, when retirement presents itself. Or a strange amalgam of the two.

    I hope 2019 will be an awesome year for you, with good health for you and yours. And more, please more, writing. (or wiring, if that’s your jam)


    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi Wilt! Always a pleasure to hear from you.

      And you are so right. Nothing brings me as much joy as writing does. And, even though it has not led to a career in writing, it has, as you pointed out, ancillary benefits (such as enviable typing skills). So, I’m sure I will continue to enjoy it even when I have lots of free time to pursue it (unlike now, when I have to squeeze it in between the cracks of other activities).

      I’m very glad you have taken up your cartooning again and embraced your gift as a cartoonist. You are very good at it and your cartoons always bring a smile to my face.

      We will both have an awesome 2019. I’ll keep writing if you’ll keep cartooning (and writing).

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Wasn’t there a character in Catch-22 who made his life as boring as possible so it would seem long? I retired in my early 50s and in the four years since have gotten an MFA in creative writing; written some short stories and started a novel; taken three online courses at MIT; and done the My Year in 1918 project. I’m going back to work for a few months next year and I keep thinking, “I’m too busy to have a job!”

    Liked by 2 people

    • Wow! You certainly have not let the grass grow under your feet since retiring! I hope I’m as motivated and active as you are after I retire. Of course, I’ll be much older than you when I retire. I’m sure my energy levels will be approaching “comatose” levels by then. 😀


  6. Those people who say you will be bored in retirement because you have no hobbies obviously don’t know you very well. One doesn’t need a hobby if one has a calling. You are a writer. You write. You will write more when you retire. Or you could just take up croquet. It doesn’t get much slower than that.

    Liked by 3 people

    • Wow … thank you, Linda! I’ve never considered my writing a calling before. I just enjoyed doing it and kept at it even though I knew I would never be able to make a living at it.

      As for croquet, if I ever decide to take it up, then I will know the end is near. Ha ha!

      Liked by 1 person

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