It’s been quite a week in the Biff household.
And by that, I mean it resulted in the types of little stories your tell your friends and co-workers and you think you’re slaying it and that you are an anecdote god, but that really are just boring your co-workers, who are thinking, “Man, this guy leads a really boring life!”
So, rather than bore you with tales that I think are quite witty but that you think are indications that I need to get out more, I’ll just summarize my week in bullet points.
Studies have shown that bullet points are:
- very bullet-y
- usually round
Some of this was covered in more detail in a previous post, so if my bullet points below intrigue you, feel free to read the more verbose edition.
So, without further ado, I bring you:
Biff’s Week In Bullet Points
- Got a molar repaired that I had chipped 5 months ago.
- Side benefit: No longer have cold sensitivity in that bionic tooth
- Now other teeth seem sub-standard in comparison
- Was unable to turn off my shower Wednesday morning
- Tried to fix it myself but only succeeded in nearly destroying plumbing (and my index finger)
- Called plumber who also struggled, thus restoring my bruised and broken ego
- Index finger healing nicely (Bonus: cool looking scar)
- My laptop died a sudden and severe death
- Unable to resuscitate. Will harvest organs in near future, then dispose of carcass at night near edge of town
- Resurrected an old laptop that I had used to install Ubuntu (Linux) so I could access email and WordPress
- Decided I’m not a big fan of Linux and will have to buy a new Windows machine this weekend.
- New PC will allow me to watch slow-loading internet sites in higher resolution
- Writing abilities not expected to be materially improved by acquisition of new PC
- Posted latest antics of Alistair and Alexis to good reviews, but low attendance.
- Original manuscript lost when laptop died, thus crushing hopes of selling it on eBay for big bucks someday. Will instead sell laptop carcass for 2 or 3 dollars in garage sale.
- Nearly got involved in internecine war at work, but then remembered I don’t care
- Only about ten more years until retirement!
- Vending machine out of Snickers bars
Well, that’s about all I can think of. If I am suddenly hit by inspiration later on, I will write more. I hate to get your hopes up, though.