“We Don’t Need No Stinking Dispatches!”
In spite of its best efforts to try to slip by us unnoticed, Friday was apprehended while trying to sneak through security disguised as an errant Thursday. Even though considered a flight risk, Friday was granted bail by a lenient judge and, when last seen, was hailing a cab towards the airport.
Fare thee well, Friday! Even though you were only in our custody a short while, it was nice while it lasted. No one can hold you for very long. You are too slippery and elusive.
In other news, there was an alarming lack of news today. Personal news, that is. There was, in fact, an excess of local, national, and international news. In spite of there being a worldwide glut of news, news sources continue to manufacture news at an alarming rate. Experts feel this will cause the price of news to crash, spurring news investors to pull their news out of more speculative, high-risk news sources and to instead protect it in hedge news and government backed news. News inflation is a concern among many of the world’s leading news brokers. As always, the small news investors and casual news traders will take the hardest hit. Retirees and others who are on a fixed news budget are expected to be the most adversely effected.
Okay, that’s enough of that. I didn’t come here to write that. I started off to tell you about my day, but I have done everything but that. However, that is because I don’t really have much to tell you. Do you think you can stand yet another thrilling recounting of one of my typical days at work? The meetings? The PowerPoints? The pie charts? The approved templates?
Well, whether you think you can stand it or not, I don’t think I’m up to the task of going through THAT mess again, so if you don’t mind I shall just keep my mouth shut and let you imagine that my day was awesome when, clearly, it was not. Otherwise, I would not have written this train wreck of a blog post.