It was another quiet day in Biffville (population: me).
That is not to say it wasn’t busy. It was. It was VERY busy. But it was the kind of busy that just makes time pass by and doesn’t really leave anything behind (like, say, a sense of satisfaction or accomplishment). It was the kind of busy that suddenly, right after you wake up, makes it late evening. This can leave one feeling a little disoriented. One minute you’re slapping the snooze alarm and struggling to sit upright in bed, and the next you’re making sure the alarm is set as you turn out the light and crawl back into bed.
I think we can all see the problem here. It is alarm clocks.
If our lives weren’t regulated by these obnoxious little so-and-so’s, life would be much sweeter. A little more chaotic, perhaps, but a lot more pleasant.
For instance, I could get up at ten AM every morning the way my mind and my body would prefer. That would be bliss for me!
However, I might find that there’s no coffee in the house, because the thousands of people it takes to get coffee from the coffee plantations of Peru and into a little red bag on my kitchen counter ALSO slept in and just couldn’t be bothered to carry out the mundane, tedious, monotonous tasks required to successfully carry out this miracle of the modern world.
But that wouldn’t matter, because there would be no electricity to power my coffee pot because the thousands upon thousands of people that it takes to get oil out from underneath the Gulf of Mexico, refined, and to the power plant that generates my electricity to power my coffee pot would have ALSO slept in and so that entire, beautiful, perfect chain of events that turns Gulf-of-Mexico sludge into coffee would have come unraveled and fallen apart.
Long story short: No coffee for Biff.
So, buzz on, Ye Noble Alarm Clock! Wake us from our peaceful slumbers and send us out into the world to do things we don’t want to do so that we can enjoy the fruits of the labors of others who also got up and did things they did not want to do.
All of humanity is being driven by our mutual dissatisfaction of what we do, and our mutual desire to have others continue to do what they don’t want to do.
It is a house of cards. But for Gosh Sakes! Please, nobody stop doing what you’re doing!